Because Ridiculous is Cool Saith I

Socks (!!!!): A mash up of the Vanilla Socks by Carle Dehning and the Fish Lips Kiss Heel by Sox Therapist; the unbelievably AMAZING Striped Turtle Toes yarn in Trenchcoat by Turtlepurl; and I really didn't make any notes on Naughty Prepster
Dress: Jason Wu for Target; similar styles by Tracy Reese, Lauren by Ralph Lauren, and a not terrible looking one from Target
Shoes: Nicholas Kirkwood; and I really stuck out trying to find non-patent mary janes, so a few non-traditional choices from Giuseppe Zanotti and Aperlai
Lips: Make Up For Ever Rouge Artist Intense in 27, satin dark rosewood

This outfit is bananas. I know this. If I was not actually wearing a slightly more bananas outfit today (with the socks), I would be even judgier. These socks are bananas. AWESOME bananas. They are my first sock-weight socks, my first knee-highs, my first self-striping yarn. I love them. I love them because I have no earthly business wearing them. I love them because they are even somehow worse in the Burberry colors. I wish I could think of more inappropriate ways to wear them.

Which came first, the yarn or the socks? Well it was obviously the yarn since I never thought I would suck it up and make myself a pair of socks. In all honesty, I started these socks at the end of last summer and would do an inch or so when I needed seriously boring knitting. But I saw the yarn on Tanis's blog and I had to have a pair. Immediately. I also knew they would have to be knee highs because I just don't have any occasion to wear ankle socks. I bought two skeins to be sure I would have enough and because the universe is my friend, these only took one skein meaning...yup elbow-length gloves will one day happen.

Wanna know why? Because sometimes life is terrible and you feel awful and you don't know from where joy will come. So you do something frivolous. And that tiny bit of frivolity pokes through the dark cloud of horrible just a little bit. And that might be enough for the time being to remind you that terrible horrible no good very bad is, of necessity, a temporary condition.

Or perhaps you're just into cos-play.

West End Girl

Sweater: West End Girl by some designer named Yelena Dasher; Black Trillium Fibres Pebble Worsted in Bright Rose
Skirt 1: J. Crew felted wool skirt; similar styles at Ann Taylor, Madewell, and T by Alexander Wang
Skirt 1: J Crew fluted mini skirt; several similar styles at ASOS including in chartreuse, purple, and hot pink, as well as a more versatile winter white at Nordstrom
Boots: Manolo Blahnik; I'm going to be honest - there is nothing out there right now like these boots which I bought from an online consignment store, however if you'd like to dream big with me, these Gucci low boots are amazing!
Lip 1: Bobbi Brown high shimmer lip gloss in Hot
Lip 2: Make Up Forever Rouge Artist natural in N31, Soft Fushia (sic)

Can you tell I had fun shooting these photos?

I saw a really cute, slightly cropped sweater by Acne last year that worked a lattice across the front and had really deep ribbing. Like a lot of capital-F fashion, it wasn't super accessible to people who aren't fashion bloggers, but I dug the lattice, and I dug the wild electric mint green it was worked in. Fast forward to seeing some of the Black Trillium Fibres bright rose shade and an idea was born. This process was not without hiccups, however, as it was my first time charting a pattern at all, and definitely my first time trying to apply a motif across multiple sizes in a way that would preserve the feel while making the sweater available to a range of people.

But I had some truly amazing and intrepid test knitters and the yarn, which I know I gush about a lot, is just ridiculously awesome (I know I'm not supposed to buy more yarn, but I am heartily tempted to get myself another SQ of this). I'm really proud of the sweater and I think it has looked wonderful on the testers which also makes me happy - the idea that people would volunteer their time and yarn and not end up with a sweater they love keeps me up at night.

Ok, so let's talk fun styling. It's a hot pink sweater. It's so outrageous, it's almost a neutral. Yes, it's fine with the grey wool skirt, but it totally works with the chartreuse one, and I also have a traffic cone orange skirt I think I'll wear it with. As for the metallic grey knee-high boots, they were a ridiculous deal (albeit used), and they fit perfectly, and I simply couldn't leave them on the site for someone else to grab. Will I wear them as often as I wear my knee-high black boots? No. Am I absolutely ecstatic that they have joined the family? Yes. Hair and makeup were also a blast for these photos. Whether I went with mod or pop, the sweater just encouraged theatricality, so I hope you find the results as amusing as I do.

And I really do think this would make a great Christmukah present to yourself - grab a SQ, take some of your time off to curl up with a sweater WIP, and show me your FO sometime next year!

Just A Pop

Sweater: Grey Havens by Maria Olson; madelinetosh dk twist in chapterbook; my notes and modifications on The Precious
Skirt: bcbgeneration black pleated "neoprene"; early identical styles from T by Alexander Wang and Rachel Zoe
Shoes: Gucci alligator peep toes; similar style (and a great deal if you've got a big foot) by Giuseppe Zanotti and for all the feet by Stuart Weitzman whom I ordinarily do not recommend, but at this price the shoes are a good deal
Handbag: Bottega Veneta; similar-ish styles by Donney & Burke and whomever these people are being sold by Century 21, but the bag is leather and $100 is a fair price for a leather bag regardless of who made it
Lips: Make Up For Ever Rouge Artist Natural in Aubergine N50 Nails: OPI for Sephora in Break A Legwarmer (discontinued, but available on ebay - I have a spare bottle for when this one runs out)

It's a beautiful day, I'm in a decent mood, so why such a drab and dark outfit? You know, I feel like grey and black get a bad rap. While I will be the first to admit that this particular outfit would have benefited immeasurably from less opaque tights (a problem that is going to be rectified asap since these were the least opaque pair in my drawer), I never understood why grey and black were automatically docked happy points. This nail polish, it makes me incredibly happy! It's a way to wear a non-traditional color without drawing unprofessional attention to one's self. I love that! Also, look how nice my smudged wine lipstick looks! And, of course, the elephant in the room also gets a bit of a boost: the purple bag. Not my choice, not my purchase, the bag was my mom's, and as I reached for my black bag this morning, a small voice inside me said, "go crazy - grab the purple bag," and I always listen to the voices in my head.

So let's talk about this outfit. The sweater was part of the Rhinebeck 2013 Let's All Wear The Same Sweaters extravaganza and was a slog and a half to get through mostly because it was bottom up and, as you can see, I fail at bottom up sizing. This sweater is too long. Not ridiculously so, but at least 1.5 fewer inches in the body and certainly 2 in the sleeves would have gone a long way. I do like the style and the buttons, I just don't like how it bunches up during the day because it's longer than what I normally wear. Like right now as I sit at my desk, I can grab four+ inches of sweater pooling up at my midsection. Attractive.

So enter the drop-pleated skirt.

I had wanted this skirt for almost two years. Or, rather, I had wanted the Alexander Wang version for two years (by the way, this would be a good time to mention (and solicit opinions on) yoox.com. I have only ordered from them once and what arrived did not enough resemble the photos or the quality I was expecting. This has led me to believe that yoox.com might be the J. Crew Factory of designer clothing - the stuff might be seconds or cheaper versions of what gets sold in stores, so buyer beware). But the Alexander Wang skirt had been over $200 and I did not have $200 to spend on a single skirt (nor do I often unless it is made of leather in which case I could be swayed - I am really lamenting my lack of a black leather pencil skirt this year, but haven't found one at a price I'm willing to pay that I really like). So when I saw this near perfect knockoff on Zappos for, I believe, about $50, I hit the buy button before you could blink. And I was overjoyed with what arrived in the mail. No, it's not actually neoprene, but it fits, it's cute, and it wasn't over $200. My husband also likes it as it gives the illusion of a rounded bottom where my actual bottom could balance a level easily. I am not flattered by pleats that start right at the waist, but I have discovered that pleats that start at or below my hipbones are amazingly awesome. More pleats, please!

Finally, these shoes are among my absolute faves. First of all, they were a sick deal. These shoes are actually made of a no-longer-alive alligator, and while that's sad for the alligator, it is divinely decadent for my tootsies. I found these on ebay in 2000 for approximately 17% of retail. In my size. From a seller with impeccable credentials. You see, back at the dawn of ebay, you could actually get a deal, an amazing deal. A sizable percentage of the fancy shoes I own came from ebay because of this. Things have changed as now there are tons of institutional sellers, but occasionally you can find a whiff of what once was. Anyway, these shoes always make my legs look good, always go with everything, and always look super duper expensive (because at some point in their life, they were). I recently retrieved them from the shoemaker who gave left vamp a bit of a patch: apparently having them solidly in the rotation throughout four seasons during 14 years can take its toll. I'm not 100% thrilled with the work they did and might get a second opinion, but the shoes themselves look pretty darned good for being such old broads. And I bring this up because while what I paid for them was a fraction of retail, it was still a fair amount for someone who had only just moved out of her parents' apartment; but they have paid dividends for 14 years and will continue to do so until they literally fall off my feet. It's why I so vehemently defend the idea of spending on shoes. They will last. And far longer than the pair you pick up at Steve Madden. Yes, I take my shoes in every year to get re-soled, re-heeled, and re-polished (if required - I don't do it for sport), but I would much rather spend the money doing that than buying a pair of plastic shoes that will disintegrate before the end of the season. Thus endeth the lecture.

Tubes

Dress: Idlewood by Cecily Glowik MacDonald; Orange Flower Aran Merino Superwash in Woodsmoke; my notes and modifications on As Far As It Goes
Shoes: Ariat riding boots; similar style (and these have held up through a lot of hard use - I've had the zippers replaced, but the shoes themselves have been workhorses - see this photo of them with wildlife...)
Lips: Make Up For Ever Rouge Artist Natural in Aubergine N50
Nails: Butter London in La Moss
Bracelet: Breil stainless steel; similar styles like an olive branch bangle, or something thinner and stackable in gold

Let's get business out of the way first: this photo was taken Tuesday and I had every intention of also writing a post on Tuesday...

I'm sure I'm not alone in impulse purchasing yarn for which no project yet exists. (Please tell me I'm not the only one.) This one-of-a-kind color needed to come live with me, but once at home didn't quite have a purpose. I had loved knitting my first Idlewood even though the yarn pilled terribly, and I love a good knitted dress, so eventually these two ideas coalesced and a project was born. It doesn't hurt that the project is on size 10 or 10.5 needles, so it really does fly. And the dress itself is great. As you can see, it will go with flattish equestrian boots and on my original project page I have it styled with my dressy boots (and perhaps a useless but delightful pair of opera length black leather gloves). However, all that fun quick knitting has, in both cases where I've knit this pattern, resulted in a pilly garment over not that much time. Interestingly enough, this yarn is 100% superwash and my other Idlewood was 80/10/10, so it's not like I can blame the cashmere.

The other problem I have is entirely my fault, but intentionally my fault, and that is because I wanted a very open cowl at the neck, there's very little fabric in the dedicated shoulder area, which means the damn thing falls off my body. Now the enormous cowl prevents this from being accidental nudity, but it is annoying to have to pull your dress up every so often. On the other hand, I have yet to exactly figure out the proper construction which gives a nice open cowl and provides enough support. My Obsidian does a better job, so I might look to it for any future cowl work.

Yet I still heartily recommend the pattern. It's super easy and super pretty and really is just a giant tube. A word of caution, though: consider putting a label in so you know which way is up. On my sweater version, because the cowl is nearly as long as the body, I cannot count the number of times I've put it on upside down. Seriously.

Urban Safari and The End of an Era

Sweater: Moody by Elena Nodel; madelinetosh 80/10/10 worsted MCN in dust bowl; my notes and modifications on Safari Moods
Dress: White House Black Market fit and flare black bandage dress; similar styles at Guess, House of Fraser, and of course if you want the original, Herve Leger
Belt: Madewell leopard belt; similar styles from J. Crew and Ralph Lauren
Shoes: Manolo Blahnik; the pair I almost bought to replace them and a more budget-friendly yet still quality pair by Schutz, you'll have to wait to see the ones I did buy...
Bracelet: Silver bangle from Tiny Sparkle Studio
Lips: Make Up For Ever Rouge Artist Natural in Aubergine N50 that I actually applied with my fingertip like the magazines say you should when you just want it to look like a stain - god, being a woman take a lot of effort

I was pretty positive I needed a leopard belt. The only belts I currently own are the polyurethane ones that accompany dresses I've bought and three of my mom's from the 70s. I haven't owned a belt of my own that was just a belt since high school. Don't ask me why, I don't have a good answer. So as part of The Adulting, I decided to intentionally buy a belt. And I love this belt, but it's been in the house over a month and hadn't been worn yet. Because it actually is a big deal for a gal like me to intentionally wear leopard. Also the belt was too big and didn't do that thing belts should do which is cinch the waist (the belt experienced a post-photography trip to the shoemaker and now fits). So how to style a leopard belt without going overboard? While leopard is a neutral, I firmly believe this, I thought I would start small and pair it with a simple black dress. But then I didn't feel like wearing a black blazer with my black dress, so I opened a tub of sweaters (for all interested parties, yes, I store my sweaters in huge plastic tubs from The Container Store - I've filled five of them; not the sweater boxes, the one called Jumbo Box! Nota bene: the majority of my shoes live in these same boxes, but the shoe sized ones) and decided to see if my Safari Moods sweater would do the trick.

The problem with this sweater is that I both love it AND I find it goes with nothing. It's got the big floppy, occasionally stand-up collar, the buttons that don't go all the way down, the short sleeves that are shorter than other short-sleeved things. It rarely makes it into the rotation even though I really like it (and worked on it when I personally went on safari so it's got good juju). Yet it works with this outfit. It's got a little of the leopard vibe without being over the top and the oversized collar contributes to the devil-may-care attitude of the outfit. And it's safari colored. I am a huge Out Of Africa nerd and go through phases where I want to look like original Banana Republic all the time, despite the fact that I live in a place that sees a distinct lack of impala and a distinct surfeit of ice and snow.



I am happy to give a shout out to Tiny Sparkle Studio on etsy who made the cool bangle and say it is the first, but by no means the last, purchase I make there. The bangle is light, simple, and perfectly my speed. I was really excited that it looked as good on my wrist as it did in the photo and at a really reasonable price. More bangles please!

And now the shoes.

Dear Manolo Blahnik Classic Black Pumps,

When you came into my life during the winter 2000 sale and I was so happy to have you, I never realized we would have so much time together, nor did I know how sad I would feel when it came time to retire you. Yes, I didn't treat you right all the time. I walked in rainstorms, on grass, and without hosiery; while I had you continuously reshod and heeled, I probably ought to have had you polished more than once a year. You went with everything and never objected to walking miles at a time. Though your heel could have been 1/2" higher like the camel pair that preceded you, you were the perfect black pump in a world where perfection is rare. I will admit that I asked the woman at the shoe place could she do anything for you, and I will spend the money to see what can be done, but your replacement has been purchased. At a high cost, both financially and emotionally, and we will no longer be to one another what we once were. You gave me 14 years of life, thereby justifying the idea of an investment shoe, and your successor has (dear god I can't believe I'm about to unironically say this) big shoes to fill. The new pumps are different. They're the naughty girl side of classic and I will likely wonder every time I wear them if that was the right decision, but it was time to move on, and so I shall, albeit much poorer than I was before you needed replacing. Fare thee well, oh shoes of mine, I shall not consign you to the garbage bin, but rather stick you in the top of the closet, a memorial to our collective lost youth.

With warmth and affection,

Yelena

Video Killed The Radio Star

Sweater: Obsidian by Lisa Mutch; Cephalopod Yarns (very very sadly going out of business) Skinny Bugga in Montauk Monster; my notes and modifications on "The Shadow Knows"
Skirt: J. Crew - my god there are still some left. I bought three. Seriously this skirt is way cheap. I even bought this color in the wrong size because I liked it so much - I figure I can just wear it lower on my hips.
Shoes: Gucci, circa 2001. Miraculously, if you wanna be you wanna be you wanna be like Mike, and you wear a size 8, another size 8, size 7, or size 11, you can own these 13 year old shoes in white (I do!). These are not the original shoes I bought (for full price - the only pair ever) in 2001 at Neiman Marcus in San Francisco, but a replacement pair I bought on ebay two summers ago. I may have treated the first pair slightly roughly (ok, I accidentally hiked in them once), and was overjoyed that I found another pair on ebay so many years later. My mom bought a pair of these shoes, and while hers are smaller than mine, I convince myself I can almost squeeze my gargantuan foot into her pair should the need arise. Conclusion: I love these shoes. A lot.
Nails: Essie in Starter Wife which, because I have a sick sense of humor, is the shade I wore for my wedding.
Toes: Essie in Watermelon, in truth I prefer the orange I've been wearing nearly all summer, but I decided to change it up for 2 weeks.
Lips: Make Up Forever Rouge Artist natural in N31, Soft Fushia (sic)
Bracelet: Ever Together (no longer in business) magnetic bracelet. I looked for other magnetic jewelry, but none had the simplicity of this one. The artist, Terrence Kellerman, had better luck with his wallet business, Dynomighty, which has gone from a tiny studio in Tribeca (where I bought this bracelet also a gazillion years ago) to a worldwide success. I'm now really glad I have a bracelet and necklace. If you wanted to recreate something like this, I'd just buy the magnets from a supply store and get creative!
Bag: Longchamp, another replacement (thanks to very generous parents who combined multiple gift giving opportunities into one super awesome gift) for a bag I got in - god, was that 2001 too?

It's my husband's fault, really. He got The Ramones' I Wanna Be Sedated caught in my head in the shower this morning. Really good and stuck in there. I figured the only way to exorcise that particular earworm was the same way history did: with neon! I don't know how often you've attempted to match things to pale chartreuse, but it is not the most versatile color out there. I had an alternate outfit that involved a knitted tank top with corset styling, but even with a sedate navy blazer, it just didn't feel all that suitable for work. Enter Obsidian. Easy, breezy, goes with everything Obsidian. The why-even-though-I-have-the-yarn-have-I-not-made-a-second Obsidian. I can wear it off the shoulder with jeans and tall black pumps for a night out, with the cowl up as a hood for all the goth dress-up events I attend, or just like this with all manner of skirts for the rest of the time. I simply cannot recommend this sweater, and in a great neutral, enough.

I frequently worry about over-icing the cake. If you have ever eaten a cake I made, you might notice that I go easy on the icing and why I complain at length about the various cupcakeries and their ridiculous mound of sickly sweet frosting. so when you have a giant cowl neck sweater and a neon skirt, what more can you add? The slingbacks are black, so neutral, but with the pink heel for fun. Since my toenails were also that shade of pink, it made even more sense (and kept the color palette to three shades: green, black/grey, and pink), at which point I had to break out the pink lipstick that my husband hates and that I adore because I'm pretty sure it makes me look like Susanna Hoffs (and if you do not know who that is, obviously you are no longer my eternal flame). I am not a neon person, generally speaking, but as I've expanded the list of colors I'd be caught dead wearing, I find that a bit of retro brightness can be both fun and appropriate when styled responsibly (so I would not wear leg warmers with this outfit unless I was going to a costume party). For anyone who has tired of the 80s references peppered within this post, I say you're just not having enough fun with your Tuesday morning!

I'm on vacation starting Thursday so I won't be posting, especially since my outfits are going to consist of sarong, wetsuit, t-shirt with the neck cut out, espadrilles. I might, however, finish my striped sweater and grab some on location shots of it (crosses fingers). See you in a week and a half!

Verdant

Sweater: Hey Girl cardigan by Bonnie Marie Burns; Wollmeise Merino DK in Fruhling, my notes and modifications for "Atlantic Pacific"
Top: Elie Tahari silk shell, similar styles by Reiss and Kate Spade
Skirt: Brooks Brothers wool skirt, similar style at Loft
Shoes: Manolo Blahnik, similar color, same style in black, for people who think I spend too much on shoes
Lipstick: Makeup Forever Rouge Artist Natural in N31 Soft Fushia (sic)

Story: I got these shoes on ebay 10 or so years ago because I couldn't resist the idea of chartreuse, patent leather, mary janes. Also, they were likely 1/5 retail. Since the idea of chartreuse, patent leather mary janes is so patently ridiculous, I try to wear them a lot. They add a lot of fun to the simplest outfit and are surprisingly versatile (though not with brown). They also make other people happy because they're acceptably outrageous.

I would never have made myself a chartreuse cardigan, however, until I saw this post by Blair Eadie last year at which point I couldn't not make myself a chartreuse cardigan. I did not make the cardigan to match the shoes. In fact, I'm pretty sure this is the first time I've worn them together. I still hate the buttons on this cardigan because they aren't the right color. They are the second set of buttons this cardigan has had, and the third set might never go on the cardigan because they're not quite right either. I hate selecting buttons for cardigans while, simultaneously being adamant that for my style, the buttons need to blend, not stand out.

The top is a bit of a departure for me. I don't tend to wear a-line tops because I like highlighting my waist. Similarly, I don't own many Nehru-style collars because they tend not to flatter the busty. I'll admit that this top is a hand-me-down and I wear it and a similar navy one in an attempt to broaden my horizons. I don't know if I would buy this style myself, but as a something different in the closet that I didn't have to buy, it can stay in the rotation.