You Keep Saying You Got Something For Me

Sweater: Taqrian by Thayer Preece Parker; wollmeise dk in sternschnuppe; my notes and modifications on Happy
Skirt: J. Crew; similar color (and an incredibly amazing style) by Marni, really cute style at Kate Spade Saturday, and in my new favorite fabric neoprene at Piperlime
Boots: Manolo Blahnik, winter '00-01; this year's far less streamlined version, and the one I would buy were I in the market is from Christian Louboutin, but to be perfectly honest, I would probably wait and see what comes next - I prefer my existing boots (which still have many more years in them) to anything currently on sale
Jacket: Reiss midnight leather moto jacket; similar styles by Veda and on sale Marc New York
Lips: Dolce and Gabbana passion duo gloss fusion lipstick in Sensual
Nails: OPI for Sephora in Break A Legwarmer

I have decided that my eccentric fashion thing, that thing I'm known for (ok, maybe the second thing I'm known for since I think I might already be known for shoes, but that doesn't seem like a "thing" - lots of women like shoes, frankly it's a hahafunny thing that pisses me off, "oh you ladies, always out shoe shopping...") is going to be leather jackets. I'm going to try to score one on sale every year and have a collection of them because I really, really like them (provided I do not pay a lot of money for them). I never owned a real leather jacket until 2012 (I had a two terribly hideous thrift store finds in my HS/College years that were terrifying - and they were 1970s men's jackets because I was too fat for ladies' vintage). I honestly didn't want to buy something of value for a body I didn't value. It's why, by the way, I own all those shoes. When I was unhappy with my shape, I didn't want to spend money to dress it. My feet, on the other hand, weren't going to fluctuate with my weight, so they could have beautiful things. I used to swan about pretty much every day in $20 dollar clothing and $500 shoes. So I bought my first leather jacket from a Canadian company, Danier, which I can highly recommend for great bargains and great quality. I started with a center zip, fitted, burgundy jacket. AND LOVED IT! Oh my, it just makes a girl look so cool to toss on a leather jacket. So this past winter, I started looking at other styles, and I fixated on the classic moto. All the cool celebrities have one (I think Balenciaga and Yves Saint Laurent are the faves), and it makes a good girl appear tough. Soon the hunt I went. I knew what I wanted: the good old fashioned classic black moto with the chrome features. I wanted these things right until the moment I tried this one on at Bloomingdale's while I was shopping for something entirely different. It fit really well. And more than that, the style fit me really well. I'm not butch, no matter how much I might think I can play at it. My tough is a different kind of tough - I'd dare to call it steely, but it's definitely not an out there, let's take this outside, kind of tough. I kept thinking of Katie Segal in Sons of anarchy and how frickin' awesome she is and how I simply do not have that same look. The midnight blue, flat matte detailed, motorcycle jacket was just...me. The non-showy kind of tough. It went on sale, I hit buy, the rest is beautiful history. I love this jacket and I love it more than I would have loved its traditional cousin. It goes great with a dress and with jeans and is trying just hard enough without trying too hard. We're a good fit.

This sweater, on the other hand, is begging for you to pay attention to it. The color is amazing. I called the project Happy because knitting this sweater with this color yarn made me happy - and I knit it at a time when I was anything but happy. This was therapy knitting and it worked wonders. I really did derive some happy from sitting down to knit this. When I originally saw the pattern, I felt certain I would make it in a neutral, but then I discovered this color, which is a pretty perfect yellow and has a bonus, slightly difficult-to-pronounce German name, and realized that I could make the sweater in a decidedly non-neutral. Before I started knitting, I would never have considered wearing yellow; now I have a surprising number of yellow sweaters and an even more surprising number of yellow yarns yet to be bought. And I'm discovering that yellow is more neutral than I thought. There are few colors that won't go with yellow, and most of them (I'm looking at you, pink) aren't colors I would own a lot of bottoms in any way. I also thought it looked pretty good under my midnight moto, which is why they went together this morning.

A note on my hair: it needs to be cut. A lot. It's kind of a disaster. However, I discovered that my slightly Mod look benefited from the old "no these bangs aren't too long, I intentionally bobby pinned them back like this because STYLE" hairdo.

Just A Pop

Sweater: Grey Havens by Maria Olson; madelinetosh dk twist in chapterbook; my notes and modifications on The Precious
Skirt: bcbgeneration black pleated "neoprene"; early identical styles from T by Alexander Wang and Rachel Zoe
Shoes: Gucci alligator peep toes; similar style (and a great deal if you've got a big foot) by Giuseppe Zanotti and for all the feet by Stuart Weitzman whom I ordinarily do not recommend, but at this price the shoes are a good deal
Handbag: Bottega Veneta; similar-ish styles by Donney & Burke and whomever these people are being sold by Century 21, but the bag is leather and $100 is a fair price for a leather bag regardless of who made it
Lips: Make Up For Ever Rouge Artist Natural in Aubergine N50 Nails: OPI for Sephora in Break A Legwarmer (discontinued, but available on ebay - I have a spare bottle for when this one runs out)

It's a beautiful day, I'm in a decent mood, so why such a drab and dark outfit? You know, I feel like grey and black get a bad rap. While I will be the first to admit that this particular outfit would have benefited immeasurably from less opaque tights (a problem that is going to be rectified asap since these were the least opaque pair in my drawer), I never understood why grey and black were automatically docked happy points. This nail polish, it makes me incredibly happy! It's a way to wear a non-traditional color without drawing unprofessional attention to one's self. I love that! Also, look how nice my smudged wine lipstick looks! And, of course, the elephant in the room also gets a bit of a boost: the purple bag. Not my choice, not my purchase, the bag was my mom's, and as I reached for my black bag this morning, a small voice inside me said, "go crazy - grab the purple bag," and I always listen to the voices in my head.

So let's talk about this outfit. The sweater was part of the Rhinebeck 2013 Let's All Wear The Same Sweaters extravaganza and was a slog and a half to get through mostly because it was bottom up and, as you can see, I fail at bottom up sizing. This sweater is too long. Not ridiculously so, but at least 1.5 fewer inches in the body and certainly 2 in the sleeves would have gone a long way. I do like the style and the buttons, I just don't like how it bunches up during the day because it's longer than what I normally wear. Like right now as I sit at my desk, I can grab four+ inches of sweater pooling up at my midsection. Attractive.

So enter the drop-pleated skirt.

I had wanted this skirt for almost two years. Or, rather, I had wanted the Alexander Wang version for two years (by the way, this would be a good time to mention (and solicit opinions on) yoox.com. I have only ordered from them once and what arrived did not enough resemble the photos or the quality I was expecting. This has led me to believe that yoox.com might be the J. Crew Factory of designer clothing - the stuff might be seconds or cheaper versions of what gets sold in stores, so buyer beware). But the Alexander Wang skirt had been over $200 and I did not have $200 to spend on a single skirt (nor do I often unless it is made of leather in which case I could be swayed - I am really lamenting my lack of a black leather pencil skirt this year, but haven't found one at a price I'm willing to pay that I really like). So when I saw this near perfect knockoff on Zappos for, I believe, about $50, I hit the buy button before you could blink. And I was overjoyed with what arrived in the mail. No, it's not actually neoprene, but it fits, it's cute, and it wasn't over $200. My husband also likes it as it gives the illusion of a rounded bottom where my actual bottom could balance a level easily. I am not flattered by pleats that start right at the waist, but I have discovered that pleats that start at or below my hipbones are amazingly awesome. More pleats, please!

Finally, these shoes are among my absolute faves. First of all, they were a sick deal. These shoes are actually made of a no-longer-alive alligator, and while that's sad for the alligator, it is divinely decadent for my tootsies. I found these on ebay in 2000 for approximately 17% of retail. In my size. From a seller with impeccable credentials. You see, back at the dawn of ebay, you could actually get a deal, an amazing deal. A sizable percentage of the fancy shoes I own came from ebay because of this. Things have changed as now there are tons of institutional sellers, but occasionally you can find a whiff of what once was. Anyway, these shoes always make my legs look good, always go with everything, and always look super duper expensive (because at some point in their life, they were). I recently retrieved them from the shoemaker who gave left vamp a bit of a patch: apparently having them solidly in the rotation throughout four seasons during 14 years can take its toll. I'm not 100% thrilled with the work they did and might get a second opinion, but the shoes themselves look pretty darned good for being such old broads. And I bring this up because while what I paid for them was a fraction of retail, it was still a fair amount for someone who had only just moved out of her parents' apartment; but they have paid dividends for 14 years and will continue to do so until they literally fall off my feet. It's why I so vehemently defend the idea of spending on shoes. They will last. And far longer than the pair you pick up at Steve Madden. Yes, I take my shoes in every year to get re-soled, re-heeled, and re-polished (if required - I don't do it for sport), but I would much rather spend the money doing that than buying a pair of plastic shoes that will disintegrate before the end of the season. Thus endeth the lecture.

On The Outside Looking In

it's raining, apologies for the terrible indoor photos - my house COULD NOT BE MORE YELLOW

Sweater: Aidez by Cirilia Rose; madelinetosh erin in antique lace; my notes and modifications on Vieux Dentelle
Dress: Alice + Olivia; similar style for this season
Shoes: Manolo Blahnik black patent, open-toe d'orsay pumps (that was a mouthful); similar style by Via Spiga, on sale for the big-footed by Gianmarco Lorenzi, and absolutely not on sale by Christian Louboutin
Toes: OPI A Roll in the Hague
Lips: Bobbi Brown Art Stick in Rose Brown

Take a look on Ravelry at the sweater patterns with the most projects and those deemed most popular and you'll notice something: there are A TON of open front cardigans. I'm wearing one today and I have made more than a few others. I would say that you can't swing a cat (and knitters love them some cats) in a room full of knitters without hitting at least half a dozen open front cardigans. I know knitters who describe their open front cardigans as THEIR FAVORITE SWEATER. And I am saying now, on September 16th, that I still don't understand why.

I assure you that the dress I'm wearing underneath my Aidez is really really pretty - I mean look how cute it is and, I would argue that my slightly more exaggerated hourglass shape is flattered even more by it than on this blonde famous person I feel certain I am supposed to recognize. And this wasn't the dress I intended to wear today. I had my DVF Kaley dress on at first until I realized that (and I'm so glad there are no disagree buttons on my blog): open front cardigans look terrible with anything approaching a structured outfit. They're just sloppy full stop. Which is fine with jeans or a housedress or that drop-waisted flannel dress they keep trying to sell you at Madewell that you keep refusing to entertain because you are no longer in high school and besides you already tried on a pair of Doc Martens laceups and remembered that they weren't flattering the first time around because you have small, autonomous islands for feet.

But I can be more accommodating. You know where else open front cardigans look ok? On the bodies of people without breasts and hips. And I'm not saying that pejoratively. If you have a slender-hipped figure with proportional breasts, open front cardigans are a-ok on you. Because they neither stubbornly refuse to remain firmly on the outside of your bust, nor do they flare out ridiculously when they meet your hips. Much like jeans and tucked in white button downs, I might have to come to terms with the fact that the open front cardigan will never be part of my weekday wardrobe. I always think I look sloppy and I always think the outfit would look better with a more tailored piece.

Now part of this is also the fault of my wardrobe in that it is long on flared dresses and straight skirts; had I more shifts, it's possible I would be less confused by what to do with my open front cardigans. However, even with the cute shirtdress I originally photographed for the Aidez FO shots, there's still a degree of not-quite-polished that upsets me. What is more upsetting is that there are a number of open front cardigan patterns I both like AND want to make: Kara, slanted Sleeven, Soubrette - though the last one I have way higher hopes for since there is an accompanying hip flare in the pattern that looks as though it might fit over both my capacious hips and flared skirts.

The other part of the problem could well be sizing - perhaps given my shape, I should knit a size larger, but dear god, what if that isn't the answer? Then I have an even sloppier FO and I'm ragey because I spent time making it and I could have had a lovely pullover instead. But I think what makes me really feel like the last kid picked on the dodgeball team is that I seem to be 100% alone in this view. Both knitters I know in person and those I only see online have love affairs with this style. Sometimes I think their FOs look lovely, but more of the time I feel like the mom admonishing her kids to tuck in their shirts. I, personally, cannot do sloppy-chic, but I don't think most of the population can. So I'll spend the day fidgeting with Aidez and searching both my brain and the ravelry database, for cardigans more suited to me lifestyle.

P.S. Who the hell drew on my dining room wall? I have a pretty strict no children-with-crayons rule.

Lalalalalala I Can't Hear You

Sweater: Chuck by Andi Satterlund; Western Sky Knits willow worsted in Quarry; my notes and modifications on All-Star
Dress: Lilly Pulitzer Blossom dress in yellow seersucker; similar styles available at Zappos and at this person's ebay store (I own the blossom dress in pink and yellow seersucker as well as in the blue silk organza - I love this dress)
Shoes: Giorgio Armani brown leather sandals, similar styles by Givenchy and Jeffrey Campbell
Lips: Dolce and Gabbana passion duo gloss fusion lipstick in Sensual
Toes: OPI A Roll in the Hague

It's not cold out. No. It's, um, cold in my office (it is, actually, really cold in my office).

In honor of the temperatures being uncooperative, I have decided to flout all convention and good taste and wear a decidedly summer seersucker (strapless) dress with a wool worsted weight cropped cable pullover AND strappy sandals. Take that, summer (and the calendar tells me it is still summer)! The dress is amazing. I bought it for my fake wedding (that would be the just-the-two-of-us moment at the place we had planned to elope before we discovered no one wanted to come elope with us) and it was perfect for that and perfect for so many other things. So perfect, in fact, that as referenced above, I have purchased it two additional times. It fits great, flatters tremendously, and is fun (something my wardrobe used to be sadly lacking). You know what else is fun? This cropped sweater. Do I wear cropped sweaters a lot? No. Should I wear cropped sweaters a lot? No. I am neither teenager nor twenty-something and the only work I do on my abs is rewarding them with cake. But I love this sweater and need to find more ways to make it acceptable clothing. So: this silly experiment. Much as I love to knit, I'm rather anti-cold weather. And by rather, I mean extremely. I love the wardrobe: fur hats, chunky cables, leather, boots, etc. but I do not like being cold. I don't like the dry air, the frigid toes and fingers, the muted sun - it all sucks. Which is why when the air was chilly this morning, I needed to rebel in the most you-can't-wear-that-after-labor-day way I could.

But I'd also like to talk about this yarn. Kim of Western Sky Knits makes beautiful yarn that I have been fortunate enough to knit with on several occasions (and plan to knit with on many more). While she has some very loyal customers who use brightly colored rainbow yarn for...something...she also dyes colors like this one, Quarry, and Barnwood which I made my Cheyenne out of. I also made and then frogged a cardigan out of her Winter Wheat and am trying to find the perfect pattern to reuse the yarn for. In short, she has a way with what I can only call nature colors. And I love them. I also love her excellent customer service and that she's a really lovely woman. Seriously: try this yarn!

And while I think I've said as much as can be said about this slightly ridiculous getup, I will renew my enthusiasm for the orange toe. I had been in navy for a couple of weeks, which I also loved, but knowing that this would likely be the last pedicure with a summer color I'd get until the next tropical vacation (which might come up sooner than anticipated), I happily painted them orange again. Summer I feel I barely knew you (and may have overcompensated by buying ALL the clamshells of greengage plums at Whole Foods yesterday), but you gave me these orange toes, and for that I thank you.

Experiment x2

Sweater: Every Girl Sweater by Laura Zukaite; madelinetosh 80/10/10 fingering in fathom; my notes and modifications on "Jane Russell"
Skirt: Calvin Klein perforated leather skirt, similar or just as much fun styles at ASOS (on sale), Joseph, and just because it's outrageous, Proenza Schouler
Shoes: Giorgio Armani brown leather sandals, similar styles by Cole Haan and Diane von Furstenburg 
Lips: Buxom full-bodied lipstick in two-timer
Fingers: Butter London in Lady Muck (frankly wish it was a little summerier - my own fault for second guessing what would look good with my tan)
Toes: OPI A Roll in the Hague (might not change this color all summer long, I adore it)
Bracelet: Breil stainless steel, not at all like these also fashionable bangles

Story: There are some things I know to be true of other women my age - they style their hair and they wear jewelry. I typically do neither. It's something I aim for.

My husband bought me the earrings I wear for my 23rd birthday and it was really sweet because I spent my 23rd birthday in the hospital having a blissfully simple and majorly life-improving bit of health care. So my then-boyfriend, now-husband, bought me diamond studs. In the many years that have passed, he has asked me on numerous occasions would I enjoy an upgrade - bigger diamond studs - and I have always said no because the earrings were an indulgence for people just starting their adult lives and I value them far more for their meaning than their size (also do I really need big horking diamonds on my ears?). Other than that, I wear my rings: engagement and wedding. I've never been a jewelry person because I am so conscious of it on me. Necklaces itch my neck, bracelets and watches interfere with my arms, I just haven't ever loved being bejeweled. Furthermore, I have such simple taste when it comes to jewelry that it seems rather boring to, like today, add a simple silver bangle. But accessories are important so I can adapt.

The hair thing is a bigger mess. I am a) impatient, b) lazy, and c) the owner of less-than-perfect hair. My hair is thin, prone to unsexy frizziness, and limp on the best of blowout days (see: my wedding). I have been using Rogaine on the front of my head for over 2 years and it's still less robust than I would like it to be. I guess I could learn to tease it. See how I said, "I guess?" Implying I won't really. So I was very excited to try the notion of beachy waves. It's easy! Simply rough towel dry your hair, spritz with salt spray, and tousel. Well, we can be the co-judges of how that turns out. I think my hair just looks messy. True, I have been cutting my own bangs and that has not gone well, but I feel way less Gisele and way more Tina Fey making a joke about falling asleep with her head in a bowl of Cheetos. I will try to find other, low maintenance ways of having hair.




But let's talk about the sweater. I love this sweater. It's got a heavy Megan Draper vibe and looks great with skinny pants when I choose to wear skinny pants. I also love wearing it with my traffic-cone orange skirt as my original photos will prove out. I even like the strange length sleeves. Generally I like long sleeves, bracelet sleeves, or short sleeves, and nothing in between. I think the cutting the arm anywhere from bicep to wrist makes the arm look shorter and, therefore, less elegant, but I don't seem to mind these 3/4 length sleeves. The sweater does have an element of impracticality, namely it's wide neck, but I'd like to try to fix that perception of impracticality.

Yes, I pushed my bra straps to the side for the photos. However, this was done largely because I was appalled by how grimy the bra straps looked when I saw them in the mirror. Clearly I need to do a laundry. I don't, however, subscribe to the theory that bra straps should never ever be seen and you should be terribly embarrassed if they are seen. That is bollocks! I didn't believe it when I was a teenager and the issue started arising, and I certainly don't believe it now. I wear a bra. You know it, I know it, everyone knows it. You should be more concerned if you thought I wasn't wearing one. Strapless bras are never as practical as those with straps and I really shouldn't have to put one on in the day time when I'm not going to a wedding. The bra I selected today has a similar color blue to the sweater in it so that when the straps do show, they're complementary, not hot pink. So the straps don't become the focus of the outfit. The pearl clutching associated with visible brassiere-ness really gets my anger up. It implies that women should be embarrassed by having breasts and needing to put them somewhere. I hear women, awesome women, complain that they can't wear such-and-such a bra because it isn't seamless and someone might see the seam of their bras through their shirts. So. Effing. What? I'm not advocating that you wear sheer blouses with firetruck red bras to the office because that's not appropriate on any level - you wouldn't want your male coworkers wearing sheer shirts and red ties - but I am saying that you are entitled to calm down about the exposure of bra-related things. You wear a bra, we all know it, and the end of the world will not occur if we notice that you are wearing a bra. Please stress less. Stress causes wrinkles.

Or is that only something my grandmother said?